Monday, May 18, 2009

Hate is a strong word.

We think saying the word "hate" is worse than dropping the "f" bomb in our house. My five year and eight month old (yes it makes a difference until you're about 25 years of age) says "BAD WORD" whenever anyone says it and you would swear she had tourettes at my in-laws house because "hate" and "stupid" fly around like flies on shit in that house. Annabelle's eyes are always bugging out of her head at us every time she hears it.

I started working out at the gym around the corner from my house because being naturally thin seems to be a part of my past. I guess making homemade chocolate chip cookies and chocolate chip buns and anything with chocolate chips isn't helping either.
So today I took part in my very first "body pump" class.
I used REALLY light weights so as not to cripple myself leaving me couch ridden for a week.
That would be bad. I'd have nothing to do but eat more chocolate chip things which would defeat the purpose of working out to begin with.
Vicious circle.

Alisha was the class teacher. Great energy, clearly very fit and spoke often of her 20 month old child.

I HATE HER.

At one point in the warm up with my teeny tiny weights I almost passed out and the only reason I didn't was because I talked my way out of it.

Inside voice: "If you pass out with only five pound weights by your side even the old lady beside you will point and laugh. Suck it up!!!"

I'm scared of how I'll feel tomorrow, but I'm terrified about how I will feel in two days.
Second day always kills and I'm sore eight hours after the class!
So...I hate Alisha. If you're reading this Alisha, I'm sorry. Annabelle if you're reading this? Mommy said a bad word. But the mean mean Alisha almost made mommy barf.

I hate you so much Alisha...that I'll come back. You know why? Not for washboard abs or because I want t run a marathon. I'll come back because I want to eat chocolate chip things and I don't want to have a heart attack. That's it. I will take your class and try my best not to blurt out...
I HATE YOU!!!

bad word!

Erin zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

1 comment:

  1. I hate Alisha too. But you know what? I hate Body Pump in general.
    You know why? Because it's a damned LIE, that's why.
    You were the smart one, being honest with your 5-pound weights! Every other lying sucker in that class, with their 10-30 pound weights are just showing off to the "Alisha's" all around the city. They're saying "I hate, you 'Alisha', but I CAN DO IT TOO, YOU KNOW!"
    They actually can't STAND to use more than a 5-pounder, but they feel the need to prove it not only to "Alisha" and the others in that class, but also to that truthful part of themselves, that is saying deep down inside, "you will die if you use the 20-pound bar. you are not that strong".
    The liar in us all takes over in the Body Pump class. Which makes you, Erin, a hero for truth.

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